第74章 CHAPTER XV THE "HERO" AND THE COWBOY(2)

"But I'd come out of my trance a little mite. The situation was miles ahead of my brain, goodness knows, but the joke of it all was gettin' a grip on me. I remembered what Effie had asked and I spoke up prompt.

"'Susannah,' says I, 'this is a particular job and we're anxious to please. You'd better do the waitin' yourself.'

"I wish you could have seen the glare that ex-housekeeper give me.

For a second I thought we'd have open mutiny. But her place wa'n't any too sartin and she didn't dare risk it. Over she walked to that table, and the fun began.

"Jonadab had laid himself out to make that meal a success, but they ate it as if 'twas pretty poor stuff and not by no means what they fed on every day. They found fault with 'most everything, but most especial with Susannah's waitin'. My! how they did order her around--a mate on a cattle boat wa'n't nothin' to it. And when 'twas all over and they got up to go, Effie says, so's all hands can hear:

"'The food here is not so bad, but the service--oh, horrors!

However, Albert,' says she to the side-whiskered man, 'you had better give the girl our usual tip. She looks as if she needed it, poor thing!'

"Then they paraded out of the room, and I see Susannah sling the half dollar the man had left on the table clear to Jericho, it seemed like.

"The auto was waitin' by the piazza steps. The shofer and Butler was standin' by it. And when Sim see Effie with her veil throwed back he pretty nigh fell under the wheels he'd been washin' so hard. And he looked as if he wisht they'd run over him.

"'Oh, dear!' sighs Effie, lookin' scornful at the wheels. 'Not half clean, just as I expected. I knew by the looks of that--that PERSON that he wouldn't do it well. Don't give him much, Albert; he ain't earned it.'

"They climbed into the cockpit, the shofer took the helm, and they was ready to start. But I couldn't let 'em go that way. Out I run.

"'Say--say, Effie!' I whispers, eager. 'For the goodness' sakes, what's all this mean? Is that your--your--'

"'My husband? Yup,' she whispers back, her eyes shinin'. 'Didn't I tell you to look out for my prophecy? Ain't he handsome and distinguished, just as I said? Good-by, Mr. Wingate; maybe I'll see you again some day.'

"The machinery barked and they got under way. I run along for two steps more.

"'But, Effie,' says I, 'tell me--is his name--?'

"She didn't answer. She was watchin' Sim Butler and his wife. Sim had stooped to pick up the quarter the Prince of Wales had hove at him. And that was too much for Susannah, who was watchin' from the window.

"'Don't you touch that money!' she screams. 'Don't you lay a finger on it! Ain't you got any self-respect at all, you miser'ble, low-lived--' and so forth and so on. All the way to the front gate I see Effie leanin' out, lookin' and listenin' and smilin'.

"Then the machine buzzed off in a typhoon of dust and I went back to Jonadab, who was a livin' catechism of questions which neither one of us could answer."

"So THAT'S the end!" exclaimed Captain Bailey. "Well--"

"No, it ain't the end--not even yet. Maybe it ought to be, but it ain't. There's a little more of it.

"A fortni't later I took a couple of days off and went up to Wapatomac to visit the Van Wedderburns, same as I'd promised.

Their 'cottage' was pretty nigh big enough for a hotel, and was so grand that I, even if I did have on my Sunday frills, was 'most ashamed to ring the doorbell.

"But I did ring it, and the feller that opened the door was big and solemn and fine lookin' and had side whiskers. Only this time he wore a tail coat with brass buttons on it.

"How do you do, Mr. Wingate?' says he. Step right in, sir, if you please. Mr. and Mrs. Van Wedderburn are out in the auto, but they'll be back shortly, and very glad to see you, sir, I'm sure.

Let me take your grip and hat. Step right into the reception room and wait, if you please, sir. Perhaps,' he says, and there was a twinkle in his port eye, though the rest of his face was sober as the front door of a church, 'perhaps,' says he, 'you might wish to speak with my wife a moment. I'll take the liberty of sendin' her to you, sir.'

"So, as I sat on the gunwale of a blue and gold chair, tryin' to settle whether I was really crazy or only just dreamin', in bounces Effie, rigged up in a servant's cap and apron. She looked polite and demure, but I could see she was just bubblin' with the joy of the whole bus'ness.

"'Effie,' says I, 'Effie, what--what in the world--?'

"She giggled. 'Yup,' she says, 'I'm chambermaid here and they treat me fine. Thank you very much for gettin' me the situation.'

"'But--but them doin's the other day? That automobile--and them silks and satins--and--?'

"'Mr. Van Wedderburn lent 'em to me,' she said, 'him an' his wife.

And he lent us the auto and the shofer, too. I told him about my troubles at the Old Home House and he thought 'twould be a great joke for me to travel back there like a lady. He's awful fond of a joke--Mr. Van Wedderburn is.'

"'But that man?' I gasps. 'Your husband? That's what you said he was.'

"'Yes,' says she, 'he is. We've been married 'most six months now.

My prophecy's all come true. And DIDN'T I rub it in on that Susannah Debs and her scamp of a Sim? Ho! ho!'

"She clapped her hands and pretty nigh danced a jig, she was so tickled.

"'But is he a Butler?' I asks.

"'Yup,' she nods, with another giggle. 'He's A butler, though his name's Jenkins; and a butler's high rank--higher than chambermaid, anyhow. You see, Mr. Wingate,' she adds, ''twas all my fault.

When that Oriental Seer man at the show said I was to marry a butler, I forgot to ask him whether you spelt it with a big B or a little one.'"

The unexpected manner in which Effie's pet prophecy had been fulfilled amused Captain Sol immensely. He laughed so heartily that Issy McKay looked in at the door with an expression of alarm on his face. The depot master had laughed little during the past few days, and Issy was surprised.

But Captain Stitt was ready with a denial. He claimed that the prophecy was NOT fulfilled and therefore all fortune telling was fraudulent. Barzilla retorted hotly, and the argument began again.