第2章 Developing Confidence 培养演讲的信心

“FIVE YEARS AGO, Mr. Carnegie, I came to the hotel where you were conducting one of your demonstrations. I walked up to the door of the meeting room and then stopped. I knew if I entered that room and joined a class, sooner or later I'd have to make a speech. My hand froze on the doorknob. I couldn't go in. I turned my back and walked out of the hotel.

“If I had only known then how you make it easy to conquer fear, the paralyzing fear of an audience, I wouldn't have lost these past five years.”

The man who spoke these revealing words wasn't talking across a table or a desk. He was directing his remarks to an audience of some two hundred people. It was the graduation session of one of my courses in New York City. As he gave his talk, I was particularly impressed by his poise and self-assurance. Here was a man, I thought, whose executive skills will be tremendously increased by his newly acquired expressiveness and confidence. As his instructor, I was delighted to see that he had dealt a death blow to fear, and I couldn't help thinking how much more successful, and what is more, how much happier this man would have been if his victory over fear had come five or ten years before.

Emerson said, “Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world.” Oh, how I have been made aware of the bitter truth of that statement. And how grateful I am that during my life I have been able to rescue people from fear. When I started to teach my course in 1912, little did I realize that this training would prove to be one of the best methods ever yet devised to help people eliminate their fears and feelings of inferiority. I found that learning to speak in public is nature's own method of overcoming self-consciousness and building up courage and self-confidence. Why? Because speaking in public makes us come to grips with our fears.

In years of training men and women to speak in public, I have picked up some ideas to help you quickly overcome stage fright and develop confidence in a few short weeks of practice.

FIRST / GET THE FACTS ABOUT FEAR OFSPEAKING IN PUBLIC

Fact Number One:You are not unique in your fear of speaking in public. Surveys in colleges indicate that eighty to ninety per cent of all students enrolled in speech classes suffer from stage fright at the beginning of the course. I am inclined to believe that the figure is higher among adults at the start of my course, almost one hundred per cent.

Fact Number Two: A certain amount of stage fright is useful! It is nature's way of preparing us to meet unusual challenges in our environment. So, when you notice your pulse beating faster and your respiration speeding up, don't become alarmed. Your body, ever alert to external stimuli, is getting ready to go into action. If these physiological preparations are held within limits, you will be capable of thinking faster, talking more fluently, and generally speaking with greater intensity than under normal circumstances.

Fact Number Three: Many professional speakers have assured me that they never completely lose all stage fright. It is almost always present just before they speak, and it may persist through the first few sentences of their talk. This is the price these men and women pay for being like race horses and not like draft horses. Speakers who say they are “cool as a cucumber”at all times are usually as thick-skinned as a cucumber and about as inspiring as a cucumber.

Fact Number Four: The chief cause of your fear of public speaking is simply that you are unaccustomed to speak in public. “Fear is misbegotten of ignorance and uncertainty,”says Professor Robinson in The Mind in the Making. For most people, public speaking is an unknown quantity, and consequently one fraught with anxiety and fear factors. For the beginner, it is a complex series of strange situations, more involved than, say, learning to play tennis or drive a car. To make this fearful situation simple and easy: practice, practice, practice. You will find, as thousands upon thousands have, that public speaking can be made a joy instead of an agony merely by getting a record of successful speaking experiences behind you.

The story of how Albert Edward Wiggam, the prominent lecturer and popular psychologist, overcame his fear, has been an inspiration to me ever since I first read it. He tells how terror-struck he was at the thought of standing up in high school and delivering a five-minute declamation.

“As the day approached,” he writes, “I became positively ill. Whenever the dreadful thought occurred to me, my whole head would flush with blood and my cheeks would burn so painfully that I would go out behind the school building and press them against the cold brick wall to try to reduce their surging blushes. It was the same way with me in college.

“On one occasion, I carefully memorized a declamation beginning, ‘Adam and Jefferson are no more.' When I faced the audience, my head was swimming so I scarcely knew where I was. I managed to gasp out the opening sentence, stating that ‘Adams and Jefferson have passed away.' I couldn't say another word, so I bowed, and walked solemnly back to my seat amid great applause. The president got up and said, ‘ Well, Edward, we are shocked to hear the sad news,but we will do our best to bear up under the circumstances.' During the uproarious laughter that followed, death would surely have been a welcome relief. I was ill for days afterward.

“Certainly the last thing on earth I ever expected to become was a public speaker.”

A year after he left college, Albert Wiggam was in Denver. The political campaign of 1896 was raging over the issue of Free Silver. One day he read a pamphlet explaining the proposals of the Free Silverites; he became so incensed over what he considered the errors and hollow promises of Bryan and his followers, that he pawned his watch for enough money to get back to his native Indiana. Once there, he offered his services to speak on the subject of sound money. Many of his old school friends were in the audience. “As I began,”he writes, “the picture of my Adams and Jefferson speech in college swept over me. I choked and stammered and all seemed to be lost. But, as Chauncey Depew often said, both the audience and I managed somehow to live through the introduction; and encouraged by even this tiny success, I went on talking for what I thought was about fifteen minutes. To my amazement, I discovered I had been talking an hour and a half!

“As a result, within the next few years, I was the most surprised person in the world to find myself making my living as a professional public speaker.

“I knew at first hand what William James meant by the habit of success.”

Yes, Albert Edward Wiggam learned that one of the surest ways of overcoming the devastating fear of speaking before groups is to get a record of successful experiences behind you.

You should expect a certain amount of fear as a natural adjunct of your desire to speak in public, and you should learn to depend on a limited amount of stage fright to help make you give a better talk.

If stage fright gets out of hand and seriously curtails your effectiveness by causing mental blocks, lack of fluency, uncontrollable ties, and excessive muscular spasm, you should not despair. These symptoms are not unusual in beginners. If you make the effort, you will find the degree of stage fright soon reduced to the point where it will prove a help and not a hindrance.

SECOND / PREPARE IN THE PROPER WAY

The principal speaker at a New York Rotary Club luncheon several years ago was a prominent government official. We were looking forward to hearing him describe the activities of his department.

It was obvious almost at once that he had not planned his speech. At first he tried to talk impromptu. Failing in that attempt, he pulled out of his pocket a sheaf of notes which evidently had no more order than a flatcar full of scrap iron. He fumbled awhile with these, all the time becoming more embarrassed and inept in his delivery. Minute by minute he became more helpless, more bewildered. But he kept on floundering, apologizing, trying to make some semblance of sense out of his notes and raising a glass of water with a trembling hand to his parched lips. He was a sad picture of a man completely overcome by fright, due to almost total lack of preparation. He finally sat down, one of the most humiliated speakers I have ever seen. He made his talk as Rousseau says a love letter should be written: he began without knowing what he was going to say, and finished without knowing what he had said.

Since 1912, it has been my professional duty to evaluate over five thousand talks a year. From that experience, one great lesson stands out like Mt. Everest, towering above all the others: only the prepared speaker deserves to be confident. How can anyone ever hope to storm the fortress of fear if he goes into battle with defective weapons, or with no ammunition at all? “I believe,” said Lincoln, “that I shall never be old enough to speak without embarrassment when I have nothing to say.”

If yon want to develop confidence, why not do the one thing that will give you security as a speaker? “Perfect love,” wrote the Apostle John, “casted out fear.” So does perfect preparation. Daniel Webster said he would as soon think of appearing before an audience half-clothed as half-prepared.

NEVER MEMORIZE A TALK WORD FOR WORD

By “perfect preparation” do I mean that you should memorize your talk? To this question I give back a thunderous NO. In their attempts to protect their egos from the dangers of drawing a mental blank before an audience, many speakers fall headlong into the trap of memorization. Once a victim of this type of mental dope addiction, the speaker is hopelessly bound to a time-consuming method of preparation that destroys effectiveness on the platform.

When H.V. Kaltenborn, the dean of American news commentators, was a student at Harvard University, he took part in a speech contest. He selected a short story entitled“Gentlemen, the King.” He memorized it word for word and rehearsed it hundreds of times. The day of the contest he announced the title, “Gentlemen, the King.” Then his mind went blank. It not only went blank; it went black. He was terrified. In desperation he started telling the story in his own words. He was the most surprised boy in the hall when the judges gave him first prize. From that day to this, H.V. Kaltenborn has never read nor memorized a speech. That has been the secret of success in his broadcasting career. He makes a few notes and talks naturally to his listeners without a script.

The man who writes out and memorizes his talks is wasting his time and energy, and courting disaster. All our lives we have been speaking spontaneously. We haven't been thinking of words. We have been thinking of ideas. If our ideas are clear, the words come as naturally and unconsciously as the air we breathe.

Even Winston Churchill had to learn that lesson the hard way. As a young man, Churchill wrote out and memorized his speeches. Then one day, while delivering a memorized talk before the British Parliament, he stopped dead in his mental tracks. His mind went blank. He was embarrassed, humiliated! He began his last sentence all over again. Again his mind went blank and his face scarlet. He sat down. From that day to this, Winston Churchill has never attempted to deliver a memorized talk.

If we memorize our talk word for word, we will probably forget it when we face our listeners. Even if we do not forget our memorized talk, we will probably deliver it in a mechanical way. Why? Because it will not come from our hearts, but from our memories. When talking with people privately, we always think of something we want to say, and then we go ahead and say it without thinking of words. We have been doing that all our lives. Why attempt to change it now? If we do write out and memorize our talks, we may have the same experience that Vance Bushnell had.

Vance was a graduate of the Beaux Arts School in Paris, and later became vice-president of one of the largest insurance companies in the world—the Equitable Life Assurance Society. Years ago, he was asked to address a conference of two thousand Equitable Life representatives from all over America at a meeting in White Sulphur Springs,West Virginia. At that time, he had been in the life insurance business for only two years, but he had been highly successful, so he was scheduled to make a twenty-minute talk.

Vance was delighted to do so. He felt it would give him prestige. But, unfortunately, he wrote out and memorized his talk. He rehearsed forty times in front of a mirror. He had everything down pat: every phrase, every gesture, every facial expression. It was flawless, he thought.

However, when he stood up to deliver his address, he was terrified. He said:“My part in this program is…”His mind went blank. In his confusion, he took two steps backward and tried to start all over again. Again, his mind went blank. Again he took two steps back and tried to start. He repeated this performance three times. The platform was four feet high;there was no railing at the back; and there was a space five feet wide between the back of the platform and the wall. So, the fourth time he stepped back, he toppled backwards off the platform and disappeared into space. The audience howled with laughter. One man fell off his chair and rolled in the aisle. Never before nor since in the history of the Equitable Life Assurance Society has anyone ever given such a comic performance. The astonishing part of the story is that the audience thought it was really an act. The old-timers of the Equitable Life are still talking about his performance.

But what about the speaker, Vance Bushnell? Vance Bushnell himself told me it was the most embarrassing occasion of his life. He felt so disgraced that he wrote out his resignation.

Vance Bushnell's superiors persuaded him to tear up his resignation. They restored his self-confidence; and Vance Bushnell, in later years, became one of the most effective speakers in his organization. But he never memorized a talk again. Let us profit by his experience.

I have heard countless scores of men and women try to deliver memorized talks, but I don't remember even one speaker who wouldn't have been more alive, more effective, more human, if he had tossed his memorized talk into the waste basket. If he had done that, he might have forgotten some of his points. He might have rambled, but at least he would have been human.

Abe Lincoln once said:“I don't like to hear a cut-and-dried sermon. When I hear a man preach, I like to see him act as if he were fighting bees.” Lincoln said he wanted to hear a speaker cut lose and get excited. No speaker ever acts as if he were fighting bees when he is trying to recall memorized words.

ASSEMBLE AND ARRANGE YOUR IDEAS BEFOREHAND

What, then, is the proper method of preparing a talk? Simply this: search your background for significant experiences that have taught you something about life, and assemble your thoughts, your ideas, your convictions, that have welled up from these experiences. True preparation means brooding over your topics. As Dr. Charles Reynold Brown said some years ago in a memorable series of lectures at Yale University: “Brood over your topic until it becomes mellow and expansive…then put all these ideas down in writing, just a few words, enough to fix the idea…put them down on scraps of paper—you will find it easier to arrange and organize these lose bits when you come to set your material in order.” This doesn't sound like such a difficult program, does it? It isn't. It just requires a little concentration and thinking to a purpose.

REHEARSE YOUR TALK WITH YOUR FRIENDS

Should you rehearse your talk after you have it in some kind of order? By all means.Here is a surefire method that is easy and effective. Use the ideas you have selected for your talk in everyday conversation with your friends and business associates. Instead of going over the ball scores, just lean across the luncheon table and say something like this: “You know, Joe, I had an unusual experience one day. I'd like to tell you about it.” Joe will probably be happy to listen to your story. Watch him for his reactions. Listen to his response. He may have an interesting idea that may be valuable. He won't know that you are rehearsing your talk, and it really doesn't matter. But he probably will say that he enjoyed the conversation.

Allan Nevins, the distinguished historian, gives similar advice to writers: “Catch a friend who is interested in the subject and talk out what you have learned at length. In this way you discover facts of interpretation that you might have missed, points of arguments that had been unrealized, and the form most suitable for the story you have to tell.”

THIRD / PREDETERMINE YOUR MIND TO SUCCESS

In the first chapter, you remember, this sentence was used in reference to building the right attitude toward public speaking training in general. The same rule applies to the specific task now facing you, that of making each opportunity to speak a successful experience. There are three ways to accomplish this:

LOSE YOURSELF IN YOUR SUBJECT

After you have selected your subject, arranged it according to plan, and rehearsed it by “talking it out” with your friends, your preparation is not ended. You must sell yourself on the importance of your subject. You must have the attitude that has inspired all the truly great personages of history—a belief in your cause. How do you fan the fires of faith in your message? By exploring all phases of your subject, grasping its deeper meanings, and asking yourself how your talk will help the audience to be better people for having listened to you.

KEEP YOUR ATTENTION OFF NEGATIVE STIMULI THAT MAY UPSET YOU

For instance, thinking of yourself making errors of grammar or suddenly coming to an end of your talk somewhere in the middle of it is certainly a negative projection that could cancel confidence before you started. It is especially important to keep your attention off yourself just before your turn to speak. Concentrate on what the other speakers are saying, give them your wholehearted attention and you will not be able to work up excessive stage fright.

GIVE YOURSELF A PEP TALK

Unless he is consumed by some great cause to which he has dedicated his life, every speaker will experience moments of doubt about his subject matter. He will ask himself whether the topic is the right one for him, whether the audience will be interested in it. He will be sorely tempted to change his subject. At times like these, when negativism is most likely to tear down self-confidence completely, you should give yourself a pep talk. In clear, straightforward terms tell yourself that your talk is the right one for you, because it comes out of your experience, out of your thinking about life. Say to yourself that you are more qualified than any member of the audience to give this particular talk and, by George, you are going to do your best to put it across. Is this old-fashioned Coué teaching? It may be, but modern experimental psychologists now agree that motivation based on autosuggestion is one of the strongest incentives to rapid learning, even when simulated. How much more powerful, then, will be the effect of a sincere pep talk based on the truth?

FOURTH / ACT CONFIDENT

The most famous psychologist that America has produced, Professor William James, wrote as follows:

“Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not.

“Thus the sovereign voluntary path to cheerfulness, if our spontaneous cheerfulness be lost, is to sit up cheerfully and to act and speak as if cheerfulness were already there. If such conduct does not make you feel cheerful, nothing else on that occasion can.

“So, to feel brave, act as if we were brave, use all of our will to that end, and a courage-fit will very likely replace the fit of fear.”

Apply Professor James' advice. To develop courage when you are facing an audience, act as if you already had it. Of course, unless, you are prepared, all the acting in the world will avail but little. But granted that you know what you are going to talk about, step out briskly and take a deep breath. In fact, breathe deeply for thirty seconds before you ever face your audience. The increased supply of oxygen will buoy you up and give you courage. The great tenor, Jean de Reszke, used to say that when you had your breath so you “could sit on it” nervousness vanished.

Draw yourself up to your full height and look your audience straight in the eyes, and begin to talk as confidently as if every one of them owed you money. Imagine that they do. Imagine that they have assembled there to beg you for an extension of credit. The psychological effect on you will be beneficial.

If you doubt that this philosophy makes sense, you would change your mind after a few minutes' conversation with almost any of the class members who have preceded you in following the ideas on which this book is based. Since you can't talk to them, take the word of an American who will always be a symbol of courage. Once he was the most timorous of men; by practicing self-assurance, he became one of the boldest; he was the trust-busting, audience-swaying, Big-Stick-wielding President of the United States, Theodore Roosevelt.

“Having been a rather sickly and awkward boy,” he confesses in his autobiography, “I was, as a young man, at the first both nervous and distrustful of my powers. I had to train myself painfully and laboriously not merely as regards my body but as regards my soul and spirit.”

Fortunately, he has disclosed how he achieved the transformation. “When a boy,” he wrote, “I read a passage in one of Marryat's books which always impressed me. In this passage, the captain of some small British man-of-war is explaining to the hero how to acquire the quality of fearlessness. He says that at the outset almost every man is frightened when he goes into action, but that the course to follow is for the man to keep such a grip on himself that he can act just as if he were not frightened. After this is kept up long enough, it changes from pretense to reality, and the man does in very fact become fearless by sheer dint of practicing fearlessness when he does not feel it.

“This was the theory upon which I went. There were all kinds of things of which I was afraid at first, ranging from grizzly bears to ‘mean' horses and gunfighters; but by acting as if I were not afraid I gradually ceased to be afraid. Most men can have the same experience if they choose.”

Overcoming fear of public speaking has a tremendous transfer value to everything that we do. Those who answer this challenge find that they are better persons because of it. They find that their victory over fear of talking before groups has taken them out of themselves into a richer and fuller life.

A salesman wrote: “After a few times on my feet before the class, I felt that I could tackle anyone. One morning I walked up to the door of a particularly tough purchasing agent, and before he could say no, I had my samples spread out on his desk, and he gave me one of the biggest orders I have ever received.”

A housewife told one of our representatives: “I was afraid to invite the neighbors in for fear that I wouldn't be able to keep the conversation going. After taking a few sessions and getting up on my feet, I took the plunge and held my first party. It was a great success. I had no trouble stimulating the group along interesting lines of talk.”

At a graduating class, a clerk said: “I was afraid of the customers, I gave them a feeling that I was apologetic. After speaking to the class a few times, I found that I was speaking up with more assurance and poise, I began to answer objections with authoritativeness. My sales went up forty-five per cent the first month after I started to speak to this class.”

They discovered that it was easy to conquer other fears and anxieties and to be successful where before they may have failed. You, too, will find that speaking in public will enable you to face what each day presents with a sure touch that confidence brings. You will be able to meet the problems and conflicts of life with a new sense of mastery. What has been a series of insoluble situations can become a bright challenge to increased pleasure in living.

“卡耐基先生，我5年前来到你举办演讲的饭店，走近了大门却不敢进去。我知道如果进去参加了训练班，迟早就要当众演讲。因此我的手僵在门把上，不敢进去；最后，我只好转身离开了。

“当时假如我知道你能让我轻易克服恐惧，克服那种面对听众的恐惧的话，我就不会浪费这5年了。”

说这番肺腑之言的人不是在桌对面讲话，而是正在对大约200名听众大发感慨。这是纽约一个培训班的毕业聚会，这位学员发表讲话时，我对他的镇定和自信印象极深。我想，这个人一定能凭借他学到的语言表达能力和自信心，极大地提高处理各项事务的技巧。作为他的老师，我很高兴看到他能勇敢地战胜恐惧。想想吧，如果他在5年或10年前就战胜了恐惧，那么他现在肯定会有更多的成功和更多的快乐。

爱默生说：“和任何其他事物相比，恐惧更能击溃人类。”这是多么让人无奈的事实啊！感谢上天，它使我有能力帮助人们从恐惧中解脱出来。我于1912年刚开始授课时，一点也不知道这项训练竟然是帮助人们消除恐惧和自卑的最好方法之一。我发现学习当众说话，是一种天然的方法，它可以帮助人们克服紧张，建立勇气和自信心。为什么呢？因为当众说话让我们控制了自己的恐惧感。

通过多年来的训练，我获得了一些方法，可以帮助你很快克服上台演讲的恐惧，在短短几周练习之后就会有信心。

一、了解当众讲话恐惧的根源

实情之一：害怕当众讲话并不只是个别现象。大学调查表明，上演讲课的学生十之八九刚上课的时候都会有上台的恐惧。在我的成人教育班里，课程刚开始的时候，学员登台的恐惧比例更高，几乎达到了百分之百。

实情之二：一定程度的登台恐惧是有利的。它是让我们具备应付环境挑战能力的自然方法。所以，当你感到自己的脉搏加快、呼吸急促时，一定不要紧张。这是你的身体对外来刺激保持的警惕，它正在为即将到来的行动做准备。假如这种生理上的准备正好适度，你会因此而思考得更快，话也说得更流畅，反而会比在普通情况下说得更精彩。

实情之三：很多职业演讲者都承认，他们从来都没有完全消除登台的恐惧。几乎每一次演讲前他们都会感到害怕，而且会持续到刚开头的几句话。要想当赛马而不当驮马，演讲者必须付出这样的代价。有些演讲者常把自己比喻成“像黄瓜一样冰凉”，其实更确切地说是像黄瓜一样皮厚和富有激情。

实情之四：你之所以害怕当众讲话，主要是因为你不习惯。鲁滨逊教授在《思想的酝酿》一书中说：“恐惧源于无知与不确定。”对大多数人来说，当众讲话正是一个不确定的因素，因此心里就不免焦虑和恐惧。特别是对新手来说，这是一连串陌生而复杂的环境，这远比学打网球或开汽车困难。只有通过千万次的练习、练习、再练习，才能把这种恐惧的状况变得单纯而轻松。那时你就会发现，只要有了成功演讲的经验，当众讲话就不再是一种痛苦，而是一种快乐了。

杰出演讲家、著名心理学家阿尔伯特·爱德华·威格玛克服恐惧的故事，自我初读以后就一直激励着我。他说，在读中学时，他被叫起来做5分钟的演讲，一想到这件事他就非常害怕。

他写道：“当演讲的日子快要到时，我就病倒了。只要一想到那件可怕的事情，我就会血冲脑门，脸颊发烧，只好跑到学校后边去，把脸贴在那冰凉的砖墙面上，好让脸上的绯红尽快消退。读大学时我还是这样。

“有一次，我小心地背下了一篇演讲词的开头。但是当我面对听众时，脑袋里突然轰的一下，就不知身处何处了。我好不容易才勉强挤出开场白：‘亚当斯与杰斐逊已经过世……’然后再也说不出一句话了，我只好向听众鞠躬，在如雷般的掌声中心情沉重地回到我的座位上。校长站起来说：‘唉，爱德华，我们听到这则悲伤的消息真是太震惊了。不过，我们会尽量节哀的。’接着是哄堂大笑。当时我真想以死来解脱，然后我又病了几天。

“我在这世上最不敢期望的，就是当一名大众演讲家。”

离开大学一年后，他到了丹佛市。1896年。掀起了一场“自由银币铸造”政治运动。他对“自由银币主义者”布莱安及其支持者的错误和空洞承诺很不满，因此他把自己的手表当了足够的盘缠，回到家乡印第安纳州。一到那里，他就自告奋勇地就健全的币制发表演讲。听众当中有不少人是他的老同学。“刚开始时，”他写道，“我在大学演讲‘亚当斯和杰斐逊’的那一幕又掠过我的脑海，我感到窒息，讲话结巴，什么都忘了。不过，就如乔西·德普常说的那样，听众和我都勉强挺过了绪论部分，这小小的成功鼓舞了我，我继续往下说了自以为大约只有15分钟的时间。让我惊讶的是，我说了一个半小时。

“结果，在以后的几年里，我成了全世界最感惊奇的人。我发现我竟然把当众演讲当成了谋生的职业。

“我终于体会到威廉·詹姆斯所说的‘成功的习惯’的含义了。”

阿尔伯特·爱德华·威格玛终于认识到，要想克服当众讲话的那种灭顶之灾的恐惧，最好的办法就是获取成功的经验，并以此为后援。

要学会当众讲话，应该有一定程度的恐惧，同时你也要学会凭借这种适度的恐惧感，使你说得更好。

即使这种登台的恐惧有时会一发而不可收，造成心灵障碍和言辞不畅、肌肉痉挛，你也不必绝望。这些症状在初学者中都很常见。只要你肯努力，就会发现这种恐惧很快就会减少到适当的程度，成为一种助力而不是阻力。

二、做好适当的准备

几年前，有一位地位显赫的政府官员在纽约扶轮社的午餐会上担任主讲人。大家都在等他介绍他部里的一些情况。

显然，他没有做好准备。他开始想发表一番即兴演讲，结果却不知该说些什么。于是，他从口袋里掏出一叠笔记。然而笔记非常杂乱，就像一卡车碎铁片。他手忙脚乱地翻着笔记，说话时更显得尴尬而笨拙。时间一分一秒地过去，他越来越绝望迷惑。他不停地向大家道歉，还想从笔记里找出一点头绪来。他用颤抖的手端起一杯开水，凑到发干的唇边。此情此景实在是惨不忍睹——他完全被恐惧击倒了，就因为他没有提前做好准备。最后，他只好坐下来。我看到的是一个最没面子的演讲家。他的演讲正像卢梭所说的某些人写的情书：“始于不知何所云，止于不知已所云。”

1912年以来，出于职业原因，我每年都要担任5000多次演讲的评委。这给我上了最重要的一课，就像圣母峰高于群山之上一样：只有做好充分准备的演讲者，才会拥有自信。这好比上战场却带着不能用的武器，或者不带半点儿弹药，又何谈攻城略地呢？林肯说：“如果我无话可说，就算是年纪一大把也会难为情的。”

假如你想培养自信，为什么不为演讲做好充分的准备呢？圣约翰说：“完全的爱，会将恐惧置之度外。”丹尼尔·韦伯斯特也说，如果他不做好准备就出现在听众面前，就像是没有穿衣服一样。

1.不要逐字背诵演讲

“充分的准备”是逐字背诵演讲吗？当然不是。为了保护自己，以免在听众面前大脑一片空白，许多演讲者会首选背诵演讲词。一旦犯了这种毛病，就会浪费时间做这样的准备，而这只会毁掉整个演讲。

美国新闻评论家卡腾堡还在哈佛大学读书时，曾参加过一次演讲比赛。他选了一则短篇故事，题目叫《先生们，国王》。他把它逐字逐句背诵下来，并预讲了好几百次。比赛那天，他刚说出题目“先生们，国王”，然后脑子里就一片空白。岂止是空白？简直是一片漆黑。他差点儿吓蒙了。绝望之余，他只好用自己的语言来讲这个故事。当评委把第一名颁给他时，他简直不敢相信。从那天起，他再也不去背诵演讲稿了。这正是他在广播事业上取得成功的秘诀。他只做些简单的笔记，然后自然地对听众谈话。

写好演讲稿并背下来的人，不但浪费时间和精力，而且容易导致失败。我们平时与人说话都是很自然的事，从不会费心思推敲字眼。我们随时都在思考，当思想清晰时，语言就会像我们呼吸的空气，不知不觉地自然流出。

温斯顿·丘吉尔也是通过经验教训才学到这一课的。丘吉尔年轻时也会写讲稿、背讲稿。有一天，他正在英国国会背诵演讲稿，突然思路中断，大脑一片空白。他感到尴尬和羞辱。他重复了一遍上一句，但还是什么也想不起来，他的脸立即变成了猪肝色。他只好颓然坐下。从那以后，丘吉尔再也不背演讲稿了。

如果我们逐字背诵演讲词，面对听众的时候会忘记。而且即使没有忘记，讲出来可能也很呆板。为什么呢？因为它不是发自我们的内心，只是出于记忆。我们私下与别人交谈时，总是会一心想着要说的事，然后直接说出来，并不会特别留心词句。既然我们平时都是这么做的，现在为什么要改变呢？如果我们非要写演讲稿、背演讲词，很可能会重蹈凡斯·布什奈尔的覆辙。

凡斯毕业于巴黎波欧艺术学校，后来成为世界上最大的保险公司之一——平衡人寿保险公司的副总裁。多年前，他应邀在西弗吉尼亚的白磺泉召开的平衡人寿公司代表会议中发表演讲，来自全美的两千名代表参加了大会。当时，他从事人寿保险才两年，可是已经非常成功，所以他被安排发表20分钟的演讲。

凡斯十分兴奋，他知道这会让他声望大增。然而，不幸的是，他却把演讲词写下来再去背。他对着镜子演练了40次，对一切都做了精心准备：每句话、每个手势、每个表情……他认为自己完美无瑕。

可是，当他站起来演讲的时候，他感到一阵恐惧。他说：“我在本计划里的职位是……”然后大脑一片空白。慌乱之中，他后退了两步，想重新开始，但脑子里仍一片空白。于是他再退后两步，想再次开始，他这样重复了三次。演讲台有4英尺高，后边没有栏杆，距墙只有5英尺宽。所以，当他第四次后退时，掉下了演讲台，跌进了隔缝中。听众们哄然大笑，有一个人还笑得跌下椅子，滚到了走道上。在平衡人寿保险公司出现这种滑稽表演，可谓前无古人。更让人拍案叫绝的是，听众真的以为这是公司特意安排的助兴节目。平衡人寿公司的一些资深员工现在还津津乐道他的演出！

可是凡斯·布什奈尔的感受如何呢？他亲口对我说，那是他一生中最没面子的事。他觉得万分羞愧，当即写了辞呈。

但是凡斯的上司说服了他，撕掉辞呈，并帮助他重建自信。后来，凡斯成了公司数一数二的演讲高手。不过，他再也不背演讲词了。我们应该以此为鉴。

我听说过很多人都背演讲稿，却不知道有谁把演讲稿扔进废纸篓后，反而说得更生动、更有效果，也更富有人性。其实，扔掉演讲稿，或许会忘掉其中几点，说起来也有些散乱，但至少会更有人情味。

林肯曾说过：“我不喜欢听枯燥乏味的说教。当我听人布道时，我喜欢看到他像在跟蜜蜂搏斗。”他喜欢听演讲者自由随意且激情澎湃的演讲。背演讲稿是绝不会表现得跟蜜蜂拼命似的。

2.预先汇集整理你的思想

那么，准备演讲的恰当方法是什么呢？很简单：要留心生活中那些有意义的、曾经给过你人生指导的经验，然后对这些经验中的思想、理念、感悟等进行汇集整理。真正的准备，是对演讲题目的思考。查尔斯·雷诺·布朗博士多年前曾在耶鲁大学演讲时说：“谨慎思考你的题目，酝酿成熟之后，它会散发出思想的馨香……再把这些思想简要地写下来，表达清楚概念即可……通过这样的整理，那些零散的片断就很容易安排和组织了。”这听起来并不难吧？事实上也确实不难，只需要一点专注和思考就行了。

3.在朋友面前预讲

当你准备好之后，要不要试讲一下呢？完全必要。这可以保证万无一失。用日常交谈的话语，把你的想法告诉朋友或同事，没有必要全部讲出来，只需要在吃午餐时朝他倾过身去，这样说：“乔，你知道我那天遇到了一件不同寻常的事。我想告诉你。”乔可能愿意听你的故事。这时你要观察他的反应，听听他的想法，说不定他会给你提出有价值的建议。他并不知道你是在预演，而且即使知道也没关系，他或许会说“聊得真痛快”。

杰出的历史学家艾兰·尼文斯对作家也有类似的忠告：“找一个对你的题材感兴趣的朋友，把你的想法详尽地告诉他。通过这种方式，你可以发现可能遗漏的见解、无法预料的争论，并找到最适合讲述这个故事的形式。”

三、给予积极的暗示

在第一章，你可能还记得这句话被用来指导建立对当众讲话训练的正确态度。现在你又面临用同样的法则去完成特定的目标，那就是将每一次演讲的机会当成一次成功的体验。有三种方法可以实现这一目标。

1.确信自己的题目有意义

题目选好之后，根据计划进行整理，并和朋友聊聊，但这样的准备还不是很充分。你还要让自己确信这个题材是有意义的，必须具备坚定的态度，以此来激励自己，坚信自己。怎样才能让自己确信这一点呢？这就要详细研究题材，抓住更深层的意义，问你自己，你的演讲将如何帮助听众在听过你的演讲之后会成为更优秀的人。

2.避免想那些使你不安的事情

举例来说，假如你设想自己可能会犯语法错误，或中间突然讲不下去，这些消极想法很可能会使你在开始之前便没有了信心。演讲之前，尤其重要的是要将注意力从自己身上移开。集中精力听别的演讲者在说什么，把全部身心放在他们身上，这样就不会给你造成过度的登台恐惧了。

3.自己给自己鼓气

除非有可以为之牺牲的远大目标，否则每一位演讲者都会对自己的题材产生怀疑。他会问自己是否适合这个题目，听众会不会感兴趣等，因此很可能一念之间就更改题目。这时候，消极的思想极有可能彻底毁灭自信，所以你应该给自己打气，用清晰明确的话告诉自己：这次演讲很适合你，因为它来自你的经验，来自你对生活的思考；告诉自己，你比任何一个听众都更适合做这番特殊的演讲；你也会全力以赴把它说清楚。这是一种古老的自我暗示法吗？也许是。但现代实验心理学家们都同意，这种由自我暗示而产生的动机，即使是假装的，也会成为人们快速学习的最有力的诱因之一。那么，根据事实所做的真诚的自我激励，效果就会更好了。

四、表现得信心十足

美国最著名的心理学家威廉·詹姆斯曾作过这样一番论述：

“行动似乎产生于感觉之后，但事实上却是与感觉并行的。行动在意念的直接控制之下，通过制约行动，我们也可以间接地制约不受意念直接控制的感觉。因此，假如我们失去了自然的快乐，那么，变得快乐的最佳方法就是快快乐乐地坐着或者说话，好像快乐本来就存在一样。如果这种方法还不能让你快乐，那就没有别的办法了。所以，要让自己感觉很勇敢，就要表现得真的勇敢，运用所有的意念去达到这个目标，那么勇气就很可能会取代恐惧。”

接受詹姆斯教授的忠告吧。为了培养勇气，面对观众的时候，不妨表现得你已经拥有了勇气。当然，除非你做好了准备，否则再怎么表现也不起作用。如果你对自己要讲的内容已经了然于胸，那就轻松地走出来，做一次深呼吸。深呼吸30秒，可以给你提神，给你信心和勇气。杰出的男高音简·德·雷斯基常说，如果你气充于胸，可以“胸有成竹”，紧张就会消失。

身体站直，看着听众的眼睛，然后开始信心十足地演讲，好像他们每个人都欠你的钱，他们聚在那儿只不过是请求你宽限还债的时间。这种心理作用将会对你大有帮助。

如果你怀疑这种理论，可以找我班上任何一个同意这种观点的学员谈谈，不出几分钟，就会让你消除疑虑。如果你没有机会和他们交谈，就听听一个美国人说的话吧。他常常被视为勇气的象征。他也曾经非常胆小，通过这种自我鼓励的训练之后，才成为最勇敢的人——他便是反托拉斯斗士、常常左右听众、挥舞着巨杖的美国总统西奥多·罗斯福。

他在自传里说：“小时候我总是病怏怏的，又很笨拙。年轻时，我最初既紧张又没有自信，因此不得不艰难而辛苦地训练自己，不只对身体，而且对灵魂和精神进行各种训练。”

幸运的是，他揭示了自己蜕变的经过：“孩提时代，我在马利埃特的一本书里读到一段话，给我的印象极深。这段话中，一艘小型英国军舰的舰长向别人讲述如何才能做到无畏无惧。他说：刚开始的时候，每个人想有所行动，但都会感到害怕。应该学会驾驭自己，让自己表现得好像毫无畏惧。这样持之以恒，原先的假装就会变成事实，通过这种练习，就会在不知不觉中真的变成无所畏惧的勇者。

“这便是我训练自己的理论依据。刚开始的时候，我害怕的事情太多了，从大灰熊到野马，还有枪手，可是我故意假装不怕，慢慢地我就真的不再害怕。大家若是愿意，也能像我一样做到。”

克服当众讲话的恐惧，对我们做任何事情都会产生极大的影响。那些敢于接受这项挑战的人，会发现自己的人品正渐臻完善，战胜当众说话的恐惧会使自己脱胎换骨，进入更丰富、更美满的人生。

有一位推销员这样写道：“在班上站起来几次之后，我觉得可以应付任何人了。一天早上，我走到一个平时特别凶悍的买主面前，当他还没来得及说‘不’时，我已经把样品摊开在他的桌上了。结果他给了我一份最大的订单！”

一位家庭主妇也说：“原来我不敢请邻居来我家里，我怕和客人不能融洽地谈话。但是上了几次课并站起来讲话之后，我决定开一次家庭舞会。那次舞会非常成功，我往来于宾客之间，尽情地与他们谈笑。”

在一个毕业班上，一名职员说：“我很害怕和顾客说话，每次总是战战兢兢的。在班上演讲几次之后，我觉得有自信而且从容不迫了。我开始理直气壮地说出不同的意见。我在班上演讲后的第一个月，销售业绩便上升了45%。”

他们发现，他们已经能够很容易地克服恐惧或焦虑；从前可能失败的事现在却成功了。你也会发现当众讲话会让你满怀信心地面对每一天的献礼。你也可以获得一种新的胜利感，迎接生活的挑战。那么，那些曾经接二连三地袭来的困境，就会变成生活中增添情趣的愉快挑战。